Stop Asking "What's Wrong?" And Ask This Instead...

How often do you ask someone else “what’s wrong?”? How often do you ask yourself this question? When we sense that things aren’t amazing… when we feel that we aren’t fulfilling our purpose… when we aren’t sure of the direction we should take… when there’s any sort of discontent with our lives, we automatically assume that something is wrong. We want to zero in on the “problem” and zap it as quickly as possible!

How many times have you identified a “problem” in your life and attempted to fix it? Have you ever fixed it and found yourself feeling the exact same way after the fix? I know I have, and my observation is that many of us find ourselves in this predicament… trying so hard to take care of our “problems” but not feeling any happier or fulfilled.

So how do we change this? Instead of focusing on our “problems” we need to focus on what we want more of in our lives. Hmmm… more… I’m sure some are thinking “I can’t possibly add one more thing to my life!”. Stick with this because I promise you can add to your life and the additions will be transformative… I know because I’ve experienced this firsthand and have worked with many others who have as well!

The following exercise is designed to bring powerful clarity. This clarity is a key to understanding not only how you can feel awesome about your life, but also how you can add the most value and generate the most success. Take your time and allow yourself to imagine…

A few thoughts as you go through this exercise…

·      Maybe you’re really down on something in your life and just escaping to the beach, golf course, etc., sounds like an awesome day right now. Vacations and escapes are great and we all need them, but this is about how we live our lives every day. If you truly believe that the beach or golf course should be a part of your everyday life, then imagine it, but in the context of everyday life and not an escape.

·      Focus on things you control… imagining an awesome day that is dependent on whether or not somebody, some organization, or something does exactly what you want is a recipe for unhappiness and consistent disappointment.

·      Toss perfection… there are things that we all do in life that we don’t love… cleaning, taking the trash out, and doing laundry are just some examples. I intentionally don’t ask about a “perfect” day because we might get caught up thinking about perfection and focusing on little things that we don’t love.

·      When thinking about “challenge” in the awesome day scenario, consider “challenge” a great thing. If you’re having trouble think of the opposite of being bored or underutilized.

·      Don’t answer these questions based on how you think someone else like your spouse, kids, parents, neighbors, church family, boss, friends, etc. would expect you to answer. This is about you… the only way you’ll get the benefit of this exercise and start to recognize the powerful clarity is by being honest with yourself.

Let’s get started!!

Take a moment and allow yourself to imagine an awesome day…

·      How do you feel?

·      Who is there?

·      How do you interact with others?

·      How do you make others feel?

·      How do you serve/contribute?

·      How do you use your passions?

·      How challenged are you to be your best?

·      What do you create?

·      What do you learn?

·      What types of experiences do you have?

·      How do you spend your free time?

·      How do you have fun?

Now, compare your answers to a typical day in your life now…

·      What is the same?

·      What is different?

·      What surprises you?

·      What passions aren’t getting used in your life now?

·      What is missing in your typical day?

·      Is there common theme?

I remember when I finally realized what was missing in my life and how awesome it felt to have the knowledge… I want you to feel the same! Stay tuned… next week we’ll focus on what we do with the knowledge to start transforming!

A couple things before you leave…

·      What are you learning? Leave a comment below and share your experience so others can learn from you!

·      Who do you want to help? Share this with them… just click share below.

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