Who Is Limiting Me? Who Am I Limiting?

Lake Isaac Trail, Berea, Ohio - Photo by Todd Sechel

Lake Isaac Trail, Berea, Ohio - Photo by Todd Sechel

What do you want your life to look like? What are you burning to do, but feel you can’t do now? 10 years ago, what did you think your life would be like now? How about 20 years ago? For many of us, we want our lives to look different in some way, there’s something that we’re putting off, or there are gaps between the life we envisioned and where we are now. Why is this? Often times we think money is the culprit… If only we had more money, we could do _____. Think again… if we dig deeper there’s something else…

Limits… they are everywhere. The scariest part is that some of our biggest limits aren’t viewed as such. Instead they are viewed as responsible ways to live our lives. And, as we allow ourselves to be limited we often impose the same limits on others!

 

When we talk about making our dreams real we get motivated and pumped up, but too many times we ignore the dark side... The dark side is the reason we aren’t doing what we know we’re meant to do. The dark side is all of the expectations, responsibilities, and beliefs that we’ve piled on our courage. Digging out is terrifying… our insecurities blare in our heads as we second guess ourselves. And, other well-meaning people feed our insecurities as they haven’t dug out and can’t comprehend other ways to live.

I want to give an example to make this real… something that affects not only us but the people we care most about… something that affects multiple aspects of our lives including our schedules, who we socialize with, and our money… something that people have strong opinions about… something that many of us are forced to make decisions about… something that may signify status and prestige, or the opposite… something that we’ve been judged about and have likely judged others about.

What comes to mind? Education.

Strikes a nerve, right? We can choose to send our kids to public or private school. If private school, do we pick a faith based school? If public school, do we choose where we live because of the schooling options? In the US now there are charter schools. How about home-schooling? I’m sure there are other options and sub-options that I’m not even thinking about, and I haven’t even touched on college!

When we talk to anyone about education emotions run high… of course we all want our kids to have the best educations possible! But who determines the best education possible? Talk to 20 people and you’ll get 20 different answers. There will be great reasons for the answers that will be backed by research, testimonies, and examples of super success stories.

When we hear all of the opinions about education old scripts start to run through our heads… I have the money to send my kids to private school, so I am being selfish if I send them to public school. Everyone in my family went to this school, so my kids have to go. Kids who are home-schooled get behind socially. Private schools are a waste of money. Kids are exposed to all kinds of bad stuff in public schools. This list only scratches the surface!

Daniel goes to public school in the community where we live. Todd and I both went to public school and never felt compelled to seriously look at private school or home schooling. We’re considering living in other areas of the world for a year as we live our vision… It took us a long time to get to the point where we’d consider this while Daniel is still in school. Why? Because of all the scripts about Daniel’s education… at first we assumed it wouldn’t even be possible! However, it’s absolutely possible if we look at all of the education options as opportunities, instead of boxing us in. Now we’ve flipped our thinking and are thrilled about the amazing learning opportunities Daniel could have living in other areas of the world for a year as a child…

It’s all a matter of perspective and what’s right for me doesn’t have to be right for you, and vice versa. The keys are to make sure we know why we’re making the decisions we make, and to make sure we aren’t limiting others. Go back to the first paragraph and answer the questions again… What’s missing? What are you putting off? What are your gaps?

Peel back the money response and dig deeper. Who is limiting you? What beliefs are guiding you? Why are you stuck? Be honest with yourself… this is the first step to making your vision real. What would happen if you flipped your belief around 180 degrees? Are there opportunities that you didn’t see before? What’s the best thing that could happen if you take a new course?

Let’s break free of our limitations and allow others to do the same. The diversity of our experiences and perspectives is what makes our life experiences rich and whole. When someone wants to step out and do something out of the mold, celebrate it and support their efforts!

Wouldn’t it be great if instead of looking around and thinking about how much we limit each other, we could look around and see others who will cheer us on as we find our courage and live our visions? Let’s be those people for each other! What limitation will you break free from today?